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20 Years on and my own Shades of Grey (but none on my head!)


posted by Susan Dominikovich on , , , ,

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I should be preparing for work tomorrow.  I am teaching a class of year 2/3 children and I am inspired by their "moon" topic to find a fantastic art idea.  Something to do with space.  I am a reliever after all...I don't have to worry about curriculum.  I can just have fun with them and hope they learn something really cool in the process.  

Space.  Moon.  Art.

My children should be in bed.  Paul is out at a course tonight, my children should be in bed and I should be preparing for work tomorrow.  

Instead, three are watching The Hobbit (again) and Madeline is busy playing cards.  By herself.  I have no idea what the game is, but it is not solitaire.  

And I am taking a trip.  A trip down memory lane.

Just before Googling "space moon art ideas for children" I made a fatal mistake.  I logged on to Facebook. 

And there at the top of my notifications was a post from a friend.  With a pic...that was familiar.  




Ack!

20 years ago, my two very dear friends were married.  They were the first (second?) from our group/gang/fellowship that tied the not.  Just babies at 21 years of age.  

We were so young.  We were all babies.  Youthful friends that went out together, celebrated birthdays together, camped together, got ticketed by the cops together.  Full of angst, full of hope, full of dreams, full of frustration, full of...idealism.  Black and white.  Right and wrong. We were university educated and had all the answers.  Pity the person who came up against us in a debate.  Battles could be fought and won on the basis of a well-formed argument and no need to consider hurt feelings or egos in the process.  Idealism.  Black and white.  Right and wrong.

20 years on and not only have I gotten married myself, moved to another country, birthed four children and gained a few kg, I have softened.  I know I have a lot of grey now (thankfully, none on my head...yet).  A lot of blurred edges that are shades of grey rather than purely black or white.  The space between right and wrong is rather large now.  I still have the fundamentals of my faith which dictate an over-riding truth to all things, but under that umbrella...blurred edges.  Softening.  

I do wonder what happened to that idealistic 20-something that I was.  Have I been knocked down a bit too often?  Is it wrong to have so many grey edges now?  To be so softened?  Have I compromised too much?

Then I am reminded of my friend's wedding invitations, which we apparently, painstakingly (I do not remember) stencilled by hand.  The verse from Ephesians which says "Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us."  



And I think to myself, perhaps this softening isn't so much about having compromised, as it is about having learned to love.  Learning to love differences.  Learning to love all people and their stories, if not their actions and their ideologies.  Learning to love just as Christ loved us.  

Righteo.  Space.  Moon.  Art. 

I do wonder if the children tomorrow will learn as much as I have tonight.

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