"Let the gratefulness overflow into blessing all around you. Then, it will be a really good day." Louie Schwartzberg
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"So dawn goes down to day"

posted by Susan Dominikovich on , ,

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Today I said good-bye to my nearly 13 year old slider rocking chair.  The age of the rocker is significant; it is also the age of my eldest baby.  My lanky, gangly, sleeping-in-to-all hours baby.  My boy-man.

We bought the slider rocker 13 years ago from The Baby Factory on Devon Street.   It was the first piece of furniture we had ever bought brand new and somehow it matched our second hand forest green 2 seater sofa perfectly. With no family nearby to hand down their baby things to us, we needed all the essentials:  crib, stroller, high chair, all-in-ones, diapers, bins, toys, singlets, cardigans.  All of it, brand new.  But the first thing we bought was the slider rocker.  The soon-to-be mama in me already had a picture of late night feeds and early morning settling, sitting in that rocker.

And I was not wrong.  It was well used. The arms of that rocker were the perfect height for cradling a baby whilst feeding or just rocking while singing a lullaby.  That rocker saw me through four babies and two houses.

Bit by bit we have sold all that baby furniture that we had to buy for our sprogs.   Saying good-bye to the white-washed crib that went through three babies and then was converted to a toddler bed from one of the twins--that was the hardest moment.  I loved that crib.  And I loved that rocker and because I am a hopeless romantic and because that chair held so many memories, I said I would never sell it, even though the matching 2 seater second hand sofa was long gone.  In fact, that slider rocker has not matched anything in my house for a very long time.  The cushion began to sag years ago and all the screws were loose.  It squeaked horribly when it rocked.

That slider rocker was only really used as a last resort for seating in my lounge, but there it remained, pushed into a corner between the stereo cabinet and the piano.  

And with another move in our future, I looked at the slider rocker one day.  The one in which I nursed and rocked my babies.  That terribly out of place and falling apart slider rocker.

It was time to go and so go it did.  To a young mum with her own wee bairns to feed.  

I saw it go, put the cash in my pocket, turned away and washed the dishes.

No tears, not even a choking at my throat.

It simply was time.

Time to move on.  Time to let go.  Time to smile and remember fondly.  But time for new memories. 

How glad I am for new memories!

Am I becoming less sentimental as I age?  Maybe I am.  I am certainly becoming less attached because I have learnt recently that nothing lasts forever.  But I already knew that.  Robert Frost and I both new that, that poem I studied back in Middle School simultaneously with our study of a classic novel, The Outsiders:

Nature’s first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold.

Her early leaf’s a flower;
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.

(by Robert Frost, "Nothing Gold Can Stay")

Nothing gold can stay.  Certainly the inevitable outcome for the leaf is to wither and die.  Clearly the rosy hues of dawn must fade to grey before they succumb to the blinding light of day.  And obviously, my golden time of raising babies is well and truly over.

But here's the thing:  there is always new gold to take its place.  And there is always more gold yet to be discovered for you.  There might be a lot of day to get through first...just ordinary grey, green, blue day before we see another golden dawn but we will see it again. There will always be another dawn, often bolder and more beautiful than the one we tried to hold on to, the one we dreaded to lose.  Be filled with joy as you anticipate the golden dawn ahead.

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11 NIV)

God has plans for gold in my future.  Plans for gold in your future.  
It's not such a bad thing after all, saying good-bye to something old and rickety and worn.  

Not such a bad thing.

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